Assisted Probasco Article

The Rights of Children Conceived by a Donor Conception


by Kris A. Probasco LCSW

Children have the right to know who they are and how they joined their family, to grow up knowing the truth. Healthy relationships are built on trust and honesty. The burden of the events, decision and outcomes belong to the parents, not the child. The parents' job is to tell all they know and the childís job to understand.

Children have a right to a positive attitude about their conception, birth, and family. How the child came into the family is of their own self worth and self-esteem.

Children have a right to freely ask questions and to express their feelings about their particular situation. It is the parent's job to resolve their feelings regarding the decision for a donor conception. The fear and concern regarding this choice belongs to the parents and the knowledge and understanding belongs to the child.

Children have the right to be accepted as individuals with a unique genetic history. It is the parentsí job to become the childís advocate and to obtain all available information. To make a decision that would continue to be of benefit and value for the child into adulthood.

Children have a right to be recognized as a full and equal member of their family. It is the parents' responsibility to secure a legal connection to the child that provides for their security. The child fully belongs in the family without expectations of exceptional behavior or achievement.  It is the parentís job to allow the child to develop into their own self, including heritage and environment.
Children have the right to unconditional acceptance and to be loved for the person they are becoming. 

Children have the right to full knowledge of their donor parent(s). Information about the child's origin is private information that belongs to the individual. 

Thank you very much for the review of this information and for your work to promote openness and honesty for children and adults who were brought to their family by donor conceptions.